Bank Holiday Monday in the UK
Next Monday is a bank holiday in the UK.
So I, along with the vast majority of the working population, will not be at work on a day of the week that we would ordinarily spend in the office.
Pleasant, but no big deal. Right? It’s only one day.
It is a big deal. It’s bigger than a big deal, it is a MASSIVE deal and Londoners – who decide not to go away to a lovely little boutique hotel somewhere – will collectively lose their minds, forget that work will ever come again, and embrace the day like it’s their last.
I’ll be one of them.
The streets, bars and parks of the English capital will be rammed with, traditionally reserved Londoners behaving like it’s spring break in one of those American teen movies that my man friends like to believe is more documentary than fictional nonsense.
(Just in case any men read this I should say to them: “Of course those films are an accurate depiction. Approximately 95% of American school girls are, indeed, in their early 20s and look like models – everyone knows that!”)
Anyway. Bank Holiday Monday. In short, it’s utterly utterly brilliant. Unless it rains.
In which case plan B kicks in and then it’s rubbish.
Everyone gets in their automobile and turns the city into an extended IKEA car park full of road rage and regret.
But they won’t give up once they’ve started the journey. Because we English love an angry queue. Hours later the sales of tea lights and cheap/pointless household furnishings have rocketed, the Swedes are laughing and we all make a promise we won’t keep – to never get in our cars again on a bank holiday Monday.
The good news is the weather forecast is looking promising. So you probably don’t have to worry about getting lost in IKEA following the arrows around that fly trap of a shop.
I’ll be in Dukes Bar, arguably home to the best cocktails in the city, with three girlfriends enjoying, no doubt, more cocktails than is entirely sensible.