Weekend just for me…
On occasion I feel the urge to retreat to safety, hide away from the world and be enveloped in the warm comfort of the familiar.
A dressing gown is usually involved, a favourite book I’ve read countless times and a place that doesn’t judge me for doing so little that a passing sloth would tut disapprovingly.
My flat would make sense I suppose. I can lock the door and nobody would ever know that I only managed to burn 14 calories in two days. But the towels aren’t fluffy enough, the food doesn’t magically appear and the bathroom isn’t laden with Molton Brown products sent from heaven.
But that is not the case at Luton Hoo Hotel, Golf & Spa.
When SLH first asked me to check this place out a couple of years ago I made terrible knock knock jokes (knock knock, who’s there, Luton, Luton Hoo… sorry) and wondered if Luton was a good spot for a posh hotel. I had never been to Luton and I’m sure it’s lovely but it just doesn’t sound quite as exotic as some of the other spots on the SLH map.
Nobody laughed at my jokes and I never actually got to see Luton as Luton Hoo is not in Luton. In fact when I typed the postcode into google maps the only place I could see anywhere near the hotel was Flowergarden Wood. Let’s take a moment to enjoy that. Flowergarden Wood. Has there ever been a more promising and wonderful name of a place? I think not.
Anyway. Since my first blissful visit I go back there to hibernate every so often and this weekend I went again.
The five senses spa treatment is top of the list although I usually get about three senses in before my sixth sense of narcolepsy kicks in. I’m told the second half of the treatment is just as splendid as the first though. Daisy was my masseuse this time round. Daisy I love you, please move in with me.
Eating, I do a lot of that and much of it takes place in my room. But I try to put actual clothes on for at least one meal. The Wernher restaurant looks a bit like the Ritz but without the unsettling sense that you might not be rich enough to be there. It is certainly worth being separated from my beloved dressing gown for a couple of hours.
On Monday morning having emerged from the Chrysalis I practically tap danced to work and upon arrival greeted everyone with smiles that I knew would make them angry. How dare I be happy on a Monday morning I could see them thinking behind tight-lipped smiles. Hoo does she think she is…
Sorry, that’s the last ‘joke’, I promise.