Just when you think it’s safe to come out of the gym, Easter arrives. I’m not sure who it was that decided that our major religious holidays had to involve overeating but that person should probably subsidise my gym membership. Because I love chocolate. And I love eggs. So naturally chocolate eggs are my nemesis.
Now, and for some time to come, they are everywhere. In every shop I go to and in every window I walk past, beckoning me with those eat-me eyes and their promises of even more delicious treats inside them.
I mustn’t give in because I’ve only just defeated my Christmas excess. And to help me I have come up with a cunning plan. While chocolate is my nemesis, heat is chocolate’s nemesis. So I am going to join forces with my nemesis’ nemesis and go somewhere sunny over Easter. Yes I am clever. No I shan’t be going to Belgium. Sorry Belgium, you’re very nice but your chocolate is not conducive to me fitting into my jeans.
Here’s the shortlist for my Easter escape.
Katitche Point Greathouse in Virgin Gorda, British Virgin Islands
The BVI is the place pirates used to go on holiday. But don’t that let that put you off, they’ve all gone now leaving behind lots of very cool names like Dead Man’s Bay and Smugglers Cove. In their place is an abundance of much more polite sailors and island upon beautiful island to explore. But I’ll need a base and this is up there with Richard Branson’s Necker Island at the top of the tree. Set on rocks with views over the Sir Francis Drake Channel, the four bedroom villa is so secluded and private that even the most determined Easter egg pusher won’t be able to find me.
Blue Diamond Riviera Maya in Playa de Carmen, Mexico
Who likes chocolate eggs and is most likely to have loads of them? Children. Who aren’t allowed into this hotel? Children. Melissa 1, Chocolate 0.
Other pluses are the private pools that come with many of the rooms here, fine dining, spa treatments, three restaurants, bars and nearby Mayan ruins. And there are no chocolatiers. I know because I checked. If the lady on the front desk who answered my call was surprised by the question she didn’t let on – that’s customer service at its best.
Villa Spalletti Trivelli in Rome, Italy
In the photographs I’ve looked at, this 12-bed villa appears to have the most beautiful collection of furniture and antiques I’ve ever seen. While it might not be as hot here as Mexico or the BVIs (and therefore less likely to climatically defeat chocolate), the fear of getting any chocolate on such beautiful things will ensure I don’t touch a crumb.
This little hotel, owned by Italian aristocrats, is close enough to the Trevi fountain to be able to throw your coin in and make a wish from your window. Not that I’ll have anything to wish for if I’m staying here.
Which one should I choose?